Laughercize!

When I saw this ad in my local hippy-based coffeeshop I searched desperately for evidence that it was a parody or a joke:




Alas, there was none. Someone is genuinely seeking payment for teaching people 'advanced laughter'. Capitalism has officially failed and should be replaced with a crude barter system by the end of the week.

Whether it's more tragic that somebody thought the creative trail blazed by 'Jazzercise' demanded a sequel, or that it took them ten years to come up with it, is a question science is not yet ready to answer. A team of clinically depressed scientists consisting of Raiders fans, Hamlet Prince of Denmark and people who serially adopt kittens with cancer are expected to provide the solution as soon as they finish posting italicized poems on myspace.

I've researched all manners of humour from lowbrow (somebody getting hit in the crotch) to sophisticated (somebody getting hit in the crotch by the Unified Field Theory) and have no idea what "Advanced Laughter" is supposed to be. What elevates it to the 'advanced' level - laughing in latin? Cackling in code? Alliterated amusement? The fact that you, apparently, have to pay someone to learn it? The idea of "mastering the art" of laughter is like that of sex with a mime: At first you wonder "why would anyone do that", before the imagination kicks in and you come up with all manner of incredible and unusual ways that could be interesting, followed by the crushing realization that the actual act would never live up to those and probably be incredibly depressing beyond anything you could voluntarily think of.

The poster gets double 'Are you serious?' points for "master the art", "4 main laugh points" and "250 ways to laugh" - all designed to imply that laughing is a complicated task that shouldn't be attempted by the untrained. If an ad can convince you you're performing a reflex action incorrectly, then - holy shit! You're breathing wrong! Stop, and don't start again till I tell you. Plus the fact that anyone with 250 separately indexed ways to laugh should be avoided until Batman shows up to kick the shit out of them.

To the person responsible for this insanity: when listing yourself as "film director and improv instructor" go ahead and add "rockstar astronaut didgeridoo carver", because no one is buying it. The director of "Gloryholes 2: Back in Black" is sufficiently busy that he can't take time out to plan and teach a course on a basic physiological function, and he doesn't even have a mythical second career in a logical impossibility like "improvisation instruction". What I'm trying to say is: the man who makes money telling hookers when to suck cock on camera has 100% more professional credibility and real actual job than you.

Perhaps realizing this a desperate lunge at credibility is made with "fusion of improv, martial arts, acting technique". The only one who needs to fuse those is the brave soul who finally infiltrates Comedy Central and assassinates Carlos Mencia, and I can tell you two things about that noble Comedy Commando:
1) He will win at least one Nobel Prize
2) He will not be found among a class of people who voluntarily pay to be taught how to laugh.

Despite all this I'm kind of hoping this takes off - it could pave the way for a career where people pay me to show them how to enjoy steak. And in the advanced class, cheerleaders.